Things Kids Say Thursday: Messes And Germs

Both of the kids said or did something mildly amusing this week, so hooray, they served their purpose in life!

Baby Girl —

One of Baby Girl’s favorite books at the moment is If You Give A Mouse A Cookie. It’s always been a household favorite, so I’m happy that she likes it as well. Her fandom means that I get to read the aloud book dozens of times per day (which may be a slight exaggeration, but let’s just say that I don’t need the book to tell the story).

After reading it to her a few times, I usually stop at a certain point on each page to get her to help fill in. I quickly found out what she thinks happens when you give a mouse a cookie or milk.

“If you give a mouse a cookie…” I say.

“He make a mess!” she exclaims.

Indeed he does.

Now for Little Man —

Y’all know that Little Man has his quirks. He’s my and Sam’s kid, after all. One of his deals is over germs. This started when he was about two or three years old. There are exceptions to his germ worries, though. For example, dropping a cookie on the floor gets a pass.

It started out by not wanting a kiss from his relatives when he was 2 or 3. “You’ll give me germs!” The top of his head was as much as he’d tolerate. If he even suspected someone took a drink from his cup or a bite of his food (which I admit would bother me, too), he’d trash it. So, cookie from the floor of Walmart? Good. Cookie his dad bit off of? Bad.

Recently at the doctor — which he hates going to because he’s scared he’ll get sick (or sicker, if it’s not a well visit) — he gave the nurse the third degree over their thermometers. “Do you even clean those things after each use? Are you sure? Do you clean the blood pressure checker? Who cleans these books? I’m going to get sick from coming here.”

Then we found out that not only does he have a hang up over using the bathroom in public places, he also has a hang up using the bathroom at home. He called me in one day because he needed more toilet paper (a ruse, as he really wanted assistance wiping, ugh) and I saw that he’d lined the toilet seat. He apparently does this all of the time now. I clean the toilets, y’all. But that makes no difference to him. He doesn’t want “butt germs” from other people. (Maybe I’m the inconsistent one here, since I’m fine with butt germs from my family, but not from the public.)

superman-scared

How we feel about public restrooms around here.

The latest thing he got weirded out over was when I baked a cake over the weekend. He was raving about how good it was and asked how I make them better than anyone else he knows.

“I make my cakes [using] love,” I told him, borrowing a line from my grandmother.

He looked alarmed. “Oh my God. What does that mean?”

Sam piped up. “That means she kisses every ingredient before putting it in,” he said.

I rolled my eyes, expecting LM to know better, but he didn’t. “You kiss things? You’re putting your germs in our food?! Oh my God, I can’t eat anything you make ever again!”

Lord.

It took a lot of talk for him to trust that I don’t really kiss the flour or the cocoa powder or the chocolate chips or whatever when I’m cooking.


Check out today’s taboo word below. Visit Eric, author of the All In A Dad’s Work blog and creator of the challenge, for details on participating.

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25 thoughts on “Things Kids Say Thursday: Messes And Germs

  1. I remember those days, many years ago but we all still laugh ourselves silly over them. :o)
    One incident stands out. My youngest son then 5 only had a 1/2 day of school so he would hang out with me as I took care of his baby sister. He used to love to watch me change her diaper as long as it was not a BM. She was about 3 or 4 months old and he was watching me change her. I had her lying on my bed. He was leaning on his elbows with his little face in his hands. As I was wiping her with a clean cloth I heard; “Hey Mom can I ask you a question?”
    “Sure, you can ask me anything you want to.”
    “When is she going to grow a penis?”
    When you have two boy first I guess it’s what they expect. :o)

    Liked by 1 person

  2. survivingbutterfly says:

    I can relate to the germ scare. My 3 sons are so afraid of each other’s germs. It drives me crazy. But somehow they don’t mind public restrooms!😒

    Liked by 1 person

  3. LOVE BG’s “He make a mess!” Just precious! ❤

    My older nephew was like LM about germs, and maybe he still is (a lil) BUT he had the best hygiene and manners of any teenager I’ve ever known, so you know, pick yer battles LOL 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  4. survivingbutterfly says:

    I just nominated you for Versatile Blogger Award !
    Versatile Blogger rules:

    Thank the person that nominated you. .
    Share the award on your blog
    Give seven random facts about yourself.
    nominate others
    notify the people you nominated
    Have fun!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. My son is newly potty trained, and he does totally fine at home, but when it comes to public restrooms he won’t go. One day we were gone a long time with friends and he literally held it in all day. I was so frustrated. And he hates hates the hand dryers. I couldn’t even go to the bathroom at the zoo because people were drying their hands w/ hand dryers so I had to take him to his dad and then go back to the bathroom by myself. UGH! Last night he peed his pants cause he wouldn’t tell his Cubbies leader that he had to go. Help mamas!!!

    Liked by 1 person

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